Our van was done on potholes is one of South East roads. We were rushing to make yet another bestseller about fishing. Each of the company promised that his story will be a masterpiece.
A dusty village with a traditional market under a colorless sky became the last stop on the track. Men said that this is the beginning virgin lenselink, so you need to stock up. Purchased only to complete, as much as the flaps lay on the asphalt. It was time to start, but lost one of our satellites — Sanya. Dissolves without sediment in the hot air. Our anger was seething and bursting to be let out: he’s always so, comrades not thinking!
And Sasha was apparently a sense of the playwright: he came exactly to the degree, when the patience of tolerant people, the fishermen, that is, we could burst.
— Oh! he exclaimed, holding up the bag. Milk and steam room.
— Lamb?
And catfish too.
So why catfish?
— Don’t rush, you’ll see!
Sasha was obsessed with soms. Generally in our company every cherished his dream, had his diagnosis. Gray raved bream. In his understanding of everything smaller than an oven damper, called bream. Leh, a handyman and fisherman from God, the champion of every competition in the extermination of fish, eager to catch carp — the one and only. For twenty years he dreamed that “the boar”, which took him seventeen hours in a kayak on a local erikam. Every night dreaming. The vovik, people without distinct desires, was omnivorous and money, but preferred the good company. By the way, the bus was it, petrol it, but also for his account, in addition — and this is a secret — Vova was the producer of our fishing series. Looks like he was the only normal person in our company and could count that all together we will drive the fish to him. As for me, I was a fisherman by mistake. Someone caught, and I took off. Sometimes, of course, that is off the hook, but more often on camera. It is fishing line, floats, poles and I — lenses, sharpness, aperture, different camera angles interesting…
Mudguards slapped on salt mounds, with the Windows open to fly in and out arrows of cane. Stop not recommended: a cloud of dust immediately caught up, and covered — goodbye fishing! The Vovik was the most severe Allergy to saline dense clubs of a dust, so we hurried to the shore, under a spreading willow, the emerald strip of grass that separates the sandy beach from the scorching steppe.
Nice dense shadow forced hot air from inside the car. Wheel comfortably umalis in hard ground. Cocked the handbrake, put the transmission. We have in place, which for so long and dreamed of each.
We turned the crayfish tails and limbs, washed down with beer.
— Firewood, firewood! — bustled Sanya, twisting some rotten stump.
Be careful! It can be Shershneva nest — Leh knew what he was talking about.
— Oh! Oh! Sasha moved the shoulder blades and rolled his eyes. — Creeps, the creeps!
He lingered in the pose of a gymnast standing on the bridge.
— What are you spinning round like bacon on a griddle? It’s just a grasshopper.
Guys, don’t want cancers? Cheap give.
Under the tree stood a man of indeterminate age with mashed enamelled bucket. Forgetting about the hornets and the delights of Oriental cuisine, we’ve rounded up the alien. Cancers! Good cancers. Moustached, green-eyed, tails that ocean brothers lobster. And just for hundreds of the bucket.
In the stump of the hornets was not, he laid down the Foundation and into the fire, crackling warmly, promised lamb of good coals. And while the flames licked wrinkled glass-lined bucket, raki blushed, gaining shame and the aroma of spices.
But pickling is not necessary? The pepper, onion, salt, finally? — Serge unwound his donkey over Sanina head.
— At worst, perhaps, necessary, and a steam lamb. You guys didn’t eat real barbecue… Grey, bumpy you their hooks over someone else’s head. Hour, a sinker head will crack.
Sasha conjured over the meat. It was delicious to watch. For barbecue, he didn’t recognise anything, except steamed lamb. And as the skewers did not recognize anything but flexible vines. He despised all sorts of sauces, salts, peppers and other seasonings. Only young fresh meat. Only coarsely chopped vegetables. In short, our Sanya was natural.
— For a shish kebab, — he said — we need two things: a steam lamb and good wood, the rest of the husk — spices, sauces all there. To taste is added only abundant salivation. Here.
Juice sprayed on ash-red heat of the coals, Sanya gently laid artfully strung willow twigs on a makeshift barbecue, cunningly woven from the same vines, and caused everyone’s first attack of salivation.
Raki meanwhile is already crunched their shells in our hands. We turned them tails and limbs, washed down with beer.
— Maybe something stronger, man? With the arrival still.
We turned heads. The alien that brought cancers, merged with the landscape, all the while, it turns out, was among us. In his hands he held a vessel destined for “the arrival”.
We’re talking fishing not used.
— Home, boys. For exceptional cases, then. Clean the grain.
Sensing our hesitation, the man had already uncorked the container.
— Bread, you say? Violate a rule? And, guys?.. No tail, no scales! Do not touch the Holy. Spook! — all said almost in unison, mingled with the rustle of disposable plastics. And immediately followed by a close-knit exhale.
— Good-Oh! Man, how you say?
Call Pankration.
For barbecue needs two things: a steam lamb and good firewood.
The drink was… the subtle taste of fusel oils just put it in the same category of strong liquids. All the rest were present and combined in the highest degree harmonious: and the fertility of the land, and pristine ecology of water and air, and the bounty of the sun. The first SIP of this miracle fell into our stomachs, spread out the natural warmth in all the nooks and crannies. Saharasia.
— How well! Broke! Come here! — poured our enthusiasm.
Pulled from the fire a breeze. Pancratic Paderno sensitive nostrils:
— But burns your lamb.
— Not-e! At the time. Easy crust valid.
It was obvious that under such zakuson continued just unavoidable. Probably why Pancratic it is unclear where he learned the second vessel, the contents of which seemed even nicer first. The second was the third. The third is the first of the bins of Vova. Dusk lay a fog on the protected sites. Dry willow was burning hot. It was hot and our faces. We were filled to the brim with chemical heat consumed. The fog was forced to wince. To talk to anyone about what is not wanted, and not traditional Russian wedding songs. Sat. All went to morning heavy repentance… And when he heard the sound. He usually made them all grab for the spinning rods, but there it was: all but Grey remained by the fire.
— Now, men, put donkey, — Serge disappeared into the darkness, dragging a bunch of their wonder-gear.
— You prepare your motion picture.
Some time in the fog recoiled sounds: the crunch of twigs, the rustling of reeds, the whistling fishing line and untwist a stubborn snort. Then there was silence. All selected Burr, appeared Grey.
— Well what? Camera to get up in the morning or wait?
— Till the morning, till the morning! — Serega was stretched at a fire on the sand and sighed.
In the morning I crawled out of the tent. The desolate fire were two figures, two bodies. One vaguely reminiscent of Sting, the other was Pankration. Let sleep! In our business, knowing when to stop is a great art. I felt perfectly. Silence and light was called immediately to drop to the camera viewfinder. The movement of water under a thin veil of mist, dew drops on spider webs, sensitive, bend of the river in the sandy spits of the — these types of sent the lens of my camera, I directed my consciousness, and I nothing I could do about it (“VIDOS” is a good word invented by one of my friend the operator, right?). Perched on the stone, I tried to catch a closeup of the threads of the fog, echoing the movement of water in suwadi; admired the play of light and shadow; building the image, literally dissolved in the nebula, floating over the river… And suddenly heard a weak “On-mo-GI – te-e!”
The guy that croaked, should be very thirsty, or he very long didn’t open her mouth. Maybe one of the guys fell off the cliff, halfway morning need? Below the narrow strip of land went to a character in wading boots with duralumin spinning in tense hands. However, to say “went” is not quite right. Someone unknown and mighty dragged him, but the man resisted and it looks like the last effort. I took the focus and pressing the record button, slowly began to run down the zoom by enlarging the frightened face of the man.
— Well, help!— he begged.
Our eyes met: mine is looking through the viewfinder, and it is filled to the brim with desperate entreaty. I could not stop the camera, it’s very expressive face was a peasant. Yes, and the moment seemed symbolic. Must be what was hidden under the water, weighed at least as the average angler.
— Help! the man was ready to cry.
Large soma safe to take for the lower jaw, wearing a solid glove in advance.
Neva coil, fatigue gave “eight”, tore in the blood of his hands.
— Guys, Wake up! Alarm! — yelled that I was the dope and air in the lungs.
The camera, however, has not stopped, but only gradually removed from the tripod. My heart-rending cry was understood properly and literally. Guys, who’s in what appeared instantly. With weapons. Sanja and axe, Grey and black poplar, Leh and bahorykom for fish. Scenic landing and closed Pancratic with an empty bottle and the Vovik with his handkerchief.
What? Where? Who?
At this point, from the depths rose a huge yellow-pale green belly. It turned over, seemed black back, and then wide and not a kind smile. It seemed, often full of fine teeth mouth you can throw a brick and an eternity to wait, until it will reach “bottom”. Small pig eyes angrily flashed. Mouth shut so that we were engulfed by the wind. “It”, bent, pulled. Man in wading boots fell to his knees. Neva “the old lady” hissed and screamed, spraying blood to the side.
— How long have you been with him? — asked Lech.
— Yes, with evening drags, Gad. Decided before ot-blow throw the last, and he took… the man was already on his feet, and the monster apparently tired and decided to give up, or think clever.
— Well, nothing! You calm down and quit slowly. Power-that is? But let’s hold that for — Leh shifted the bahorykom from hand to hand.
— No, I got it.
After some time a huge catfish surfaced submarine at our feet. His gaze was still bad. To be honest, I haven’t met anyone. No fish, no eye contact. All tensed. Lech brought the bahorykom. The camera is coolly recorded the dramatic moment…
His eyes again caught the man broke out in horror. The fish turned a giant turbine. Neva coil plaintively squeaked. And if not for Sanja, whatevskis for one boot, and Vova, who managed to grab second, if not Lenin the bahorykom poddavki strap quilted jackets, and Grey, giving its number in the right direction, Pancratic would not say:
— Just go, Goblin!
The man pulled ashore. And he, well done, the bait is not dumped. All stood, breathing. Pancratic suddenly flinched, as if what I saw is what the actors portray, and the finger:
III. He’s there…
All turned their heads and focused the views on the reel. She gently rotated, smoothly relieving shaggy, badly knackered the braid. There was a pause. A good pause. Like Gogol, when the auditor came.
Until all slowly came what is happening, the coil is all sped up and began to poskulivaet. Finally it came, and wet the boots, the jacket flew to the side. Dragged! Toothy smile again buried in the shore. From the corner of terrible mouth stuck a cigarette hanging izgibanii Twister.
— The gloves come on! — Lech yelled, holding the beast’s lower jaw bahorykom.
What is the gauntlet? Why? Leh, angry that nobody understands him, took off his Panama khaki, wound on the hand and, contrive, grabbed the beast by the brush teeth in the lower jaw. Com, bulging eyes (and why this mighty fish got those buttons?), went into a tailspin. But Leh, your flying ACE, the wheel not dropped, even though he himself turned the screw. And the fish, having a fulcrum in the form of Lehi, curled tighter and, like a giant scythe, held by the tail on a narrow strip of land under the stone. From muddy waters alternately appeared heads, last flew moustached mouth, catfish again is bent, ready to leap. But Sanya was ahead.
Is anesthetized! he shouted and dropped the butt of an axe, hitting the most sensitive spot catfish: the catfish gets strong when sighting shot on the upper lip, he stretches a log and says nothing.
— One, two, three… — paced, Vovik.
Now the catfish lay in the sun a pile of meat on the leeches on his giant skull flies were crawling, and over it went bipedal one. This was the sad result. Fatality met, and from the participants of this meeting depended nothing. Just some people are lucky and others not so much. It happens always, the coin usually falls flat.
Dazed by the happiness of the man congratulated, patted on the back, shoved his fists in the chest, shaking hands:
— Well, you give! On rotten basket! Well of 0.4, but rotten! On Twister with untsovy head! No, you, man! Well done!
— Was about to return home — once again explained the happy man, — the vacation is over, it’s time. Yeah decided to finally quit, celebrated at an evening dawn. He’s going to Bang, think again and sleep. And then out what happened. Well, you appeared to be next. Ten hours he dragged me on the shore shook. All night. As not gone — I do not understand.
And carp I was carrying a kayak. And so it went. Long ago it was. A student — Lech thought must be remembering myself slender and with a thick mane, and suddenly said: — to Weigh.
— And how? We have the balance up to twenty pounds.
— Go on steelyard, strong blue (Grey, your not going) and a rope.
Now, the candidate of physical and mathematical Sciences! Cola was scrapped. One end of it rested in the root on the edge of the cliff, he brought the hook of a spring balance. The scrap was located horizontally, and at a point near to the root on the cord hung a fish. Turned out raznobrazie scales. Multiply the readings of the spring balance on the “attitude” of the shoulders and got…
— Twenty-seven-and-a-half, Twenty-seven and a half. Well, multiply anyone! — Lech was kept whitened fingers, the ring of spring balance.
— Stop! ‘I said. Everyone froze and turned to my voice. I walked over and everyone shook hands.
Thank you! Cut!
