“It’s all the West has corrupted you! The Germans!” I say even friends. But it’s not. Anti-Soviet came by myself, and I well remember how it was given the first impulse.
Natalie Carrot describes what her childhood suddenly came, uncontrollable, SCARY thoughts”. They came out her will, “from somewhere”. So it was with this momentum.
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We lived in poverty even by Soviet standards. Reading “Vanka Zhukov,” Chekhov was not in the least surprised that he slept on the chest of the evil relatives – it was an accurate description of my situation.
On the wall hung a picture of a Soviet magazine, where the daughter asked mom, “when is the Lenin going to go?” Lenin worked for our happiness and his face lit lamp. The poem I, preschooler, reading, just enjoying the fact that letters comes a certain sense, each night falling asleep.
And here I am, apparently, 6-year-old birthday, for to school I still did not go, the gift of a BOOK! It was the first thing that was my property. The book had pictures and I have reread it, something like reviewing your favorite movie, savoring every interesting place. As with the poem that drew me not the meaning, and the wonderful miracle of the different letters comes out kind of content.
Pictures didn’t interest me.
So many days passed, and finally the enthusiastic phase gave way to more sober and I’ve actually READ the book. It was about how a detachment of red army soldiers tracked down, surrounded and destroyed the whites. It seems that somewhere in Siberia there were a lot of forests and trees.
Of course, everything was good and beautiful in our best country, thought I, like all children. Only here in the book, I somehow confused some fact. I could not understand WHAT. And suddenly, right on Carrot, I suddenly came UGLY thought: “Well, whites – bad, and I do not understand what a good red, but why do they have to KILL for it?” After all, you just have to EXPLAIN to them that they would all understand! Those silly queer people! And they just killed! This TERRIBLE thought for a long time never left me.
And so the question arose in all. And then never let up.
Only once in my life, the class in the 5th-6th talking with my mom about politics within the USSR. She said some very simple words:
All the lies and deception.
I couldn’t believe how it ALL?
– Yes, everything in the papers about the progress and we barely barely make ends meet all my life we write about “people power and freedom”, and one word will immediately give you a… they Decide everything for us, did not understand where do not get one.
After a moment’s silence.
– The factory scream about “over-fulfillment” plan, and the plan and generally it is not done is not something that exceeded. But “exceeded” its just false information. Lying, in General, always.
And so long ago all around the veil of propaganda is not perceived only as a cartoon, but after this “conversation” and not just internally laughed.
Since then and until now never and the fact none of my anti-Sovietism is not even remotely refuted.
And now to watch this neo-Soviet HELL around!
