Almost every mother at some point is confused, looking hysterical child.
What to do in this situation is to punish? Ignore? Regret? And most importantly – how to prevent the frequent repetition of the hysteria and safely to outgrow the age crisis.
The development of the child’s personality is rarely without emotional outbursts is one of the variants of embodiment of a small person. However, to prevent a deliberate manipulation of his parents and achieve what you want with tantrums, not worth it. What are the causes of children’s tantrums, how to prevent the recurrence of tantrums and stop if it has already begun, says child psychologist, art therapist Anna Trukhan.
I would venture to guess that almost every parent dreams of an obedient child.
CAUSE OF CHILDHOOD WHIMS – THE BEHAVIOR OF PARENTS
Adults scratching their heads, spend a lot of effort and energy trying to figure out where are those naughty boys and girls. For some reason, favorite baby suddenly turned into a real hysterical? What is broken in the interaction with the child, and any possible “fix” there? Usually, “failure” occurs due to lack or excess of something. There were too many options. Today we will talk about one of the main components of the problem.
The strongest impact on children of having their parents ‘ attention. It was his absence can introduce a child to a Moody state. Overprotection will lead to tantrums. Hysteria — it is a splash, a burst of energy, if you want an emotional explosion. On the force and duration of the shock wave can be very diverse. It then covers the baby.
Remember how you react to the lack of attention to your people? Remember? Someone says about your needs openly, someone starts to make trouble by finding a variety of premises. Sometimes, we begin to hurt. Ill, we receive much-needed attention in the form concern. Yes, Yes, adults can throw tantrums in order to attract someone’s long-awaited opinion.
The lack of emotional communication with parents is one of the main causes of childhood hysteria. Accordingly, in order to obtain the necessary attention, the children resorted to methods not always clear, and enjoyable for parents. This type of behavior is usually called non-constructive.
WHY ARE CHILDREN SO QUICKLY LEARN THE BASICS OF BAD BEHAVIOR?
Consider a situation, characteristic for primary schools. In the first days of September, first-graders get acquainted with new orders of school life. During Breakfast, two “newly” schoolboy Vova and Kolya behave differently. Vladimir, gently, without disturbing anyone eats his portion. Kolya, “revolving around her, and not only of its axis, constantly dropping the spoon, time to dirty up a new jacket and thickly to sow the entire area of the table with his Breakfast. A teacher with great patience to fuss near the bully: “nick, don’t do it! Nick, sit down and eat! Take a spoon, be careful” Usually, by the end of the first week all know a first grader Kolya. At this time, calm Volodya learns that if you want to get attention from the teacher, need to do something to knock the spoon on the table, scattering the food. If not enough, the determination of rowdy action the child to lie on the table, turns away and cries. Paying attention only to bad habits, we thus fixed the bad behavior of the children.
Children easily learn bad habits because the adults give them too much attention. After all, to pay attention to bad behavior simply. It catches the eye. Kids are doing it intentionally. The child goes unconscious, striving for the cherished goal – the attention of an adult.
This does not mean that you have to close your eyes on all the antics of her baby. But for the most part the bad behavior of the children to ignore is necessary. As soon as we cease to notice it, it will disappear.
HOW TO PREVENT A TANTRUM FROM A BABY
The child lost interest in hysteroid cries follow two rules:
Ignore
Praise
With children, of any age, ignoring the need to understand your clear position not to go on about him. You must hold eye contact, calm voice tell the child that you are always happy to listen and help him when he is calm. That is why you are willing to wait, and, so far, will go about their business. All prohibitions and waivers must be adequate and substantiated.
Praise your toddler for what he already knows and does or begins to do. As soon as the child’s behavior is changing, note this fact. Praise is an art. It works wonders, it can change the person affect the relationship. Learn to praise your child.
What would be hysterical is not your baby, to shout and to beat him you should not. If you had this experience and you think that through such actions, the child was healed and stopped, do not expect that it would last forever. Rest assured that he has received from you the lesson of communicating with yelling and force. And as soon as he needs anything, he will scream with new vigor. Right achieve a relevant adult.
If you are ready to explode:
Pause, stay alone;
Drink some water
Breathe
Sit down and start drawing. This activity can help you calm down and to interest the child. When a child after a tantrum flared up and fit to see what you do, find a way to offer him to create a joint drawing.
Any failure can be avoided if the time to implement preventive measures. Communicate with your child, put bans and certainly argues them, offer along with it or find alternative classes. Give yourself the opportunity to live with the child in various emotional States. Fill your communication with bright impressions, kindness, mutual support and reciprocal participation. Fill the emotional needs of the baby. Let him feel your love.
